Discovering identity

“I am currently deployed to Romania and have been struggling with feelings of loneliness, separation, and distance from God. A couple weeks ago I decided to start listening to the Dwelling podcasts in addition to attending the chapel services on base. This decision came as I was doing my taxes and God hit me with some truth bombs out of nowhere. For some reason Identity popped into my head and I started really thinking about what it was that I identified myself as - an athlete? A Soldier? A leader? I realized that I have been putting my identity and value in the wrong things and that I need to put my value in how Christ sees me. I put my thoughts on paper - about 2 pages worth - not even sure what I was doing that for at the time. Later that weekend I listened to Pastor Gunter's sermon on Identity and loving your neighbor. That same morning the chapel sermon was on the loveless church in Ephesus from Revelation. It was almost as if God reaffirmed that it was him who was speaking to me. 

Then, yesterday, I saw a post on Facebook from a friend who is on the Serve Team at The Dwelling. He asked for prayer for the friends and family of a Soldier at Fort Stewart who had died in a motorcycle accident. I wanted to encourage him, being a fellow Army officer, but I didn't really know what to say. After writing and rewriting the thought that I couldn't quite put into words, the comment that finally came to mind was this: "So sorry to hear about this tragedy. I will say, you are in a very unique position to be a light in an incredibly dark time. Praying that God would somehow use this for his glory and that he would use you as his voice." I really hoped that it was God's encouragement through me and not just words coming from me, but I wasn't sure. Today I listened to last week's podcast where Adam brought the message. He talked about how we are the light in a dark world and that as soon as we accept Jesus, we begin to light up the dark places. Adam also mentioned how cool it is that God uses us to be his voice and gives us the opportunity to be a part of what he is doing. It blew me away when I heard that. 

I have never had a "big voice" God moment. I have struggled with feelings that my testimony doesn't matter that much because I don't have one of those big inspiring testimonies that brings people to their knees in awe. I just wanted to share this in the hope that it would encourage someone that no matter how small the circumstance, God is a good dad and he reassures us when we need it. Sometimes it's something huge and powerful, but sometimes it's in the subtle messages that seem like they could be coincidence but by faith I know that it is so much more. I'm still learning to discern God's voice, but it's comforting to know that I have a dad who is actively working to help me get there.” - Neal